Friday, September 25, 2009

Fox News operated by liberals

The Skunk

Shockwaves were sent through the conservative community today, when an anonymous video uploaded to YouTube revealed that the Fox News organization is operated by hard-core liberals.

In the hidden camera video, which was taken inside a conference room during a high-level Fox editorial meeting, former Vice President Al Gore and Jesse Jackson are seen discussing the stories to be broadcast on the channel that bills itself as “Fair and Balanced.”

In the video clip, Gore and Jackson agreed to have Glenn Beck jump on a chair during his show that night, shouting to the cameras that health insurance should only be available to the wealthy.

Gore is heard expressing his concerns. “You think they’ll buy it?” he asks Jackson.

Jackson responds by breaking down into laughter and asking Gore, “You serious?”

Moments later, Glenn Beck enters the room and Gore gives him his instructions. Beck gives a two-minute improvised rehearsal of the scene, eliciting applause and more laughter from Gore and Jackson. Beck then “high-fives” the famous Democrats and gives them each a hug, before exiting.

A press release issued later in the day from Fox admitted that Gore and Jackson had been running the news division since 2004.

Most Fox viewers seemed confused by the revelation. “Why in shit would the liberals want to make themselves look bad?” asked Jalby Fibbrau, a firearms disperser from Montana. “Why would they encourage us to wear teapots on our heads? Why would they instruct us to call Obama both a socialist and communist, if they had some say in it? Why would they want us to hold up silly signs with pictures of their leader as the Joker?”

He removed the “Had enough Change?” cap from his head and brushed his hand through his hair. “I just don’t get it.”

Others sense conspiracy. “They’ve been using us,” said Ernie Tilwater, Republican Mayor of Splintliver, Tennessee. “The liberal media has been working with the elite intellectuals and gun control lobbyists to purposely make us believe everything Sean Hannity and Glenn Beck tells us, as a way to ruin our credibility.” Tilwater called it “mind control” and believed the CIA and 9/11 conspirators had “something to do with it.”

But head of the Republican National Committee Michael Steele wasn’t rattled. He said his party knew all the time that the Fox news broadcasts weren’t authentic. “Our members pretended to follow O’Reilly, Beck and those people,” he said, “so the other side will think we’re idiots.”

Asked why the RNC would want the Democrats to believe such a thing, Greene responded, “I’ll have to get back to you on that.”

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