Saturday, March 10, 2007

BREAKING: Giuliani Admits Current Affair with Gingrich Ongoing During Clinton Impeachment

New York, NY (APE) - The headquarters for the Rudolph Giuliani presidential campaign today released a statement in which Giuliani admits to a long-term and ongoing affair with former Speaker of the House and also possible Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich. Giuliani further admitted that he was engaged in the affair during the time in 1998 in which Gingrich led the successful Republican charge for impeachment against then-President Clinton over lying under oath in regards to sexual indiscretions with White House intern Monica Lewinsky.

A spokesperson for the Giuliani campaign maintained that the relationship between Gingrich and Giuliani has always been nothing more than platonic. They described Giuliani as being "captivated" by the power and sheer animal magnetism of Gingrich, a man of Kennedyesque sexual appetites. If confirmed, this would be the fourth affair attributable to Gingrich, currently married to his third wife who represents his second or third affair, depending upon the interpretation.

Offices of the former Speaker of the House Gingrich stated simply that the descriptions of the affair are "accurate" and would not elaborate further. Gingrich himself would offer no comment, and insiders have described his current wife as "devastated".

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