Remember a few decades ago when conservative parents used to keep themselves awake at night worrying about the music of Judas Priest or Kiss shooting mind control rays full of Satanism into their children’s brains? Those would be today’s “center-left” voters.
To be a true conservative American Jesus warrior these days, you must move past these obvious entrapments and master the skill of identifying the hidden agents of Lucifer that lurk among us. Take, for instance, that group of sixth-grade girls over there in the Girl Scout club. What are they doing over there, standing around with their vaginas attached to them and not yet pregnant? Well that should be obvious enough, but just in case, Indiana state Rep. Bob Morris will spell it out for you: they are communist lesbian witch-abortionists.
Rep. Bob Morris is therefore unable to support his legislature’s resolution honoring the 100th anniversary of the Girl Scouts, so that he can still go to Heaven and stand next to Jesus and they can laugh together at all the little Girl Scouts burning in hell. READ MORE »
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