American Media Hates Peaceful Protesters For Not Being Violent Pigs

Occupy Wall Street has just completed its ninth day — but you wouldn’t know, since America’s glorious free press is too busy covering the Big Stories: “New Ben and Jerry’s flavor in poor taste?” and “Man with broken leg survives 4 days in desert” and “Michele Bachmann goes somewhere, says something”).

The anti-American media-fairness group FAIR recently deduced, “The answer to the problem of non-coverage would seem to be simple: If the people occupying Wall Street want more media attention, they should just call themselves Tea Party activists.” Noticing the lack of teabag bedazzlement, the official organ of the progressive movement (the New York Times, obviously) lamented, “The group’s lack of cohesion and its apparent wish to pantomime progressivism rather than practice it knowledgably is unsettling.”

Your former editor/Breitbart rentboy arrived in Manhattan last night and is now living amongst these seedy people, with their evil messages of “peace” and “no more corporate greed” — and we plan on writing many vainglorious articles, chastising concerned Americans who are sleeping in a park for not being more like the violent slob-beasts who bring assault rifles to their corporate-backed Freedumb shindigs, which last two hours/until the scooter batteries run out of juice (you know, what the New York Times once called a “platform for conservative populist discontent”). We even made a video! We’ll be making lots of videos this week, because we want to help the New York Times expose these “pantomiming” deadbeats. READ MORE »